Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Life

by Amy Moe

This isn't really an answer to this comment, but another question for everyone. Yesterday a family member told me that I tend to bring all the city council stuff home with me. As in, I don't separate work life and home life. This statement came to me after a full day of dealing with yet another water main break, issues with a city employee, and being late for my job. After reflection on that statement, it is probably accurate. But, how can I NOT take it home with me, when literally every single morning (at least this week anyway), I am getting calls from citizens or other board members about issues, training 2 new employees..ect, ect. I guess I am looking for any words of wisdom or helpful suggestions on how to be a leader in your community AND have a life.
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5 comments:

Brad Schroeder said...

Amy,

That is tough. I don't know that I have any words of wisdom, but maybe some of support. I have been in similar shoes before in a job where I had to be on call and jump into fixing problems whenever the phone rang. I struggled with the same problems, trying to separate home from work, when work was invading my home. I can't say I found a great solution, but I did observe that when I made a conscious effort to communicate with my family over the issues, they understood and helped me deal with the situation. I also tried to make my family time a priority when I wasn't getting called by work, so when the work phone did ring, my family didn't feel as neglected. Sorry I don't have any better advice, but I do feel for you and the situation you are facing.

February 4, 2009 at 10:28 AM
Darah said...

Hello Amy! Sorry for the late reply. Hopefully things have gotten much better. I tend to take work home with me a lot too...literally computer and work at home!

When it comes to the problem of leaving work stresses at work though, I think it's important to make a conscious effort to remind ourselves after work that this is "family time" or "my personal time" now. It's also a wonderful idea to actually do something for yourself everyday, whether right after work or sometime before bedtime to have some relief from the daily stress. You can do this by yourself, with friends, kids, ...whatever it is. I think "taking work home with us" is a bad habit and many of us do it. And, to change it requires a personal awareness & even a routine change that helps you actually enjoy your personal time. You might want to find more/better ways to detox, vent, or relax after work. My best personal stress releivers and/or detox things to do, even for a little bit, is read, talking on the phone, or exercising -riding horse/groom the horse even. I have a friend who likes to take pictures or scrapbook for a little bit.

The other work related advice (maybe!?) is to make a "don't do list" to minimize the overwhelming load of stuff you have to do. Then,focus on the priortities of your work. And, firmly establish/communicate what your roles actually are...perhaps you're taking on some burdens that aren't necessarily fair for you to manage or manage alone....rely on others to help if you can sometimes.

Hope my ramblings were either helpful or amusing...laughing is a good stress reliever too! Take care, Amy!

February 4, 2009 at 6:31 PM
Mitch said...

Amy,

I too struggled with this my first year of teaching. I would stay at school until 5 or later and take all my paperwork home. Papers were getting corrected until 10 PM and I literally had no me time. I went through one year of that, and the next year once I left school, I took no papers home. I may have stayed a litte later or arrived early, but when I left I left everything there. My third year of teaching was much easier - arrive & leave on time with no paperwork home! Life was great and I made sure I had time for me and what I wanted to do, whether it was lounging around or out with the livestock.

I think whenever we take on something new, we tend to get overwhelmed because we are perfectionists. I have struggled starting out here in trying to keep everything separate. It has gotten easier as the months pass, but I have to make a conscious effort to separate work and home.

Good luck!

February 5, 2009 at 9:39 AM
Anonymous said...

Happy Friday All!!

I want to thank you guys for your comments and your support. I had checked this Blog yesterday mid-morning at work, and took the time to digest before posting. I woke up this morning realizing that three main points kept running through my head.

1. From Brad: I also tried to make my family time a priority...

2. From Darah: perhaps you're taking on some burdens that aren't necessarily fair for you to manage or manage alone...

3. From Jolene: ...we tend to get overwhelmed because we are perfectionists.

Each of you hit the nail right on the head. I am absolutely a perfectionist and am taking way too much on myself. At first I thought I needed to, because it seemed that no one else was. This morning I realized that is their issue. I am determined to follow through with the goal I have just set, which is setting boundaries. The boundaries have gotten way too blurred..and putting that in perspective I think is helping.

So, after I am done writing this, the City Council doesn't exist..for today at least. I am not answering my phone, because hey, there ARE FOUR other people that could answer theirs'. And I have made plans for tonight to go out and have a good time with friends and family.

If the horse is in the barn, he can stay there, cause I am not looking for him today.

Thanks!!!
Amy

February 6, 2009 at 8:04 AM
Joel Keierleber said...

It sounds great that you can leave your jobs for home. Being on a ranch the job is just outside the front door, 24/7. Family time is often spent in the cattle lot, hay feild or other farm activity. My wife seldom left school at school even after 33 years of teaching. so we were in the same predicament.

March 2, 2009 at 7:16 PM

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